Friday, April 30, 2010

AGAINST ME- Borne On The FM Waves Of The Heart

No, it's not what we meant to say.

We don’t really love each other.

What happens when the summer’s over?

How long before distance becomes a chore?

I'm approaching with great, great trepidation.

I hope you’ll understand.

Before you speak think about what you're trying to say.

Who else is there to blame for miscommunication?

You're getting caught up in the excitement.

You making promises you can’t keep.You need to leave all your options open.

Too much momentum.

This room feels like it's going to explode.

Too many angles.

Too many factors to cover.

Waiting for signal.

You're searching for network.

You have to fight to stay in control of the situation.

Anxiety, Anxiety you give me no mercy.

Grind my teeth smooth and flat in my sleep.

We took some pills to calm us down.

Then we needed help to come back up.

Just trying to stay in control of the situation.

Too much momentum.

This room feels like it's going to explode.

Too many angles.

Too many factors to cover.

Waiting for signal.

You're searching for network.

You have to fight to stay in control of the situation.

They fall apart so easily.

Too much momentum.

This room feels like it's going to explode.

Too many angles.

Too many factors to cover.

Waiting for signal.

You're searching for network.

You have to fight to stay in control.

You have to fight to stay in control.

No, you don’t have to fight to stay in control of the situation.

im fucking hate you


i got so many problem here and i fucking dont know how im going to continue my life here. im always know someday our relationship will end because of me. im fucking love you until i cant thinking rationally right now. im fucking high and i never used to it. i cant feel anything right now because my head was so dizzy untill i cant see every alphabets on my keyboard. im just started to typing all the shit here because i dont have anyone to talk bout it. how im going to release my stress unless you talk to me and give me the reason why we should end our relationship. we used to be happy together before and we used to ignore everything that came towards us. we fight everything and we conquer all our feeling to be a happy couple. im fucking damn crying all the time because of you. why you never consider my feeling and my fucking problem. its all about my life and im hope that you will always understand me but everything that i expected from you was never true. you leave me hanging in the middle of nowhere. you decided everything before you talk to me first.


' sit together and slow talk' (someone had said it before)


but you never want to listen me.


nevermind starting from now i will be a heartless person. i swear is true.



sorry because i hurt you and thank for everything.



haha t' emosi la plak minah nih. jgn percaya with every single words thats come from me. sebab aku tipu ja tuh. (yaka?)

D R U N K


IM DRUNK BECAUSE OF U


IM GET SICK BECAUSE OF U


IM VERY HURT BECAUSE OF U


IM REALLY PAIN BECAUSE OF U




BUT U...


JUST IGNORE ME AND ASK ME TO GO DIE SOMEMORE





L O V E

DO WE NEED LOVE???

YES!!!!!


BUT FOR NOW IM PREFER TO LOVE THIS MORE THAN

EVERYTHING! =))







ask me for :
1. fall in love with cigar
2. fall in love with ' human'
which 1 is better????
linlin will reply : is better if im sick because of 'cigar' because is more pain100 when the person who you are love hurt u.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010



i want to be super extremely thin!!!!!!



lately, dlm kepala otak macam : aku nak kurus. aku taknak makan. aku sangat sangat nak kurus.



Put no other task above getting thin. Make a commitment to exercise, any exercise. Make a commitment to diet, any good diet will do. No, i don’t need the next guru diet book. No, i don’t need to fly to the Bahamas to shop for groceries. No i don’t really need a gym membership.


i just need i. i need a dedicated mind. i need massive weight loss desire. i need to be willing to sacrifice now to have what i want later.


but can i manage it? can i look slim and let other people do shut their mouth from talking about me?? stop them from saying ' lin u look more chubby now' or stop them from shouting 'linlin is fat now!!!' do you know guys, i really get sick and depressed when i heard someone said something like that to me. i dont know what is going wrong with me. but i really cant stand with it. so here i try my besh to loss weight.


before that check my daily routines :


* practical(morning or evening shift)

*online

*shower and wash uniform(without washer machine)

*sleep


almost everyday i will end my day with this activities. i cant find the right time to do exercise and its hard for me to find a balance diet here. how im going to loss my weight???!!!!!

i dont want to be an aneroxia [Anorexia nervosa is a psychiatric illness that describes an eating disorder characterized by extremely low body weight and body image distortion with an obsessive fear of gaining weight. Individuals with anorexia nervosa are known to control body weight commonly through the means of voluntary starvation, excessive exercise, or other weight control measures such as diet pills or diuretic drugs. While the condition primarily affects adolescent females, approximately 10% of people with the diagnosis are male.Anorexia nervosa, involving neurobiological, psychological, and sociological components, is a complex condition that can lead to death in the most severe cases. ]


somebody! can you fucking tell me how im going to loss weight and how to slow down my tyres factory from getting produces more and more spare tyres??!!!


kaya la makcik ni duk jual tyres spare part hari2. nak beli kat makcik?? makcik bagi diskaun.nak tak???!

*geezzz* its really *********




ok this is how i look like :









gmbar jauh nampak kurus tapi hakikat nya.................rumah tuh pon hilang kalau aku berdiri depan2.(tipu tp betul)


gig for this coming weekend at cherating terengganu.
he ask me to come along.
i will my dear =))
hati berkata : tak jauh sangat ke sampai nak pi ganu. isnin aku kerja kot.

AGAINST ME!





FAVOURITE BAND

"Are you restless like me?" --"Up the Cuts"Against Me! New Wave A decade ago, Tom Gabel began his music career as a 17-year old solo acoustic act known as Against Me!, belting out songs of rebellion in Laundromats and any other venue that would have him.


Flash forward to today, and Gabel's agitation cycle is still cranked high, but not without a wild streak of optimism thrown in for good measure. For the past five years, the gravelly roar of the vocalist/guitar player has been part of a thunderous and thoughtful foursome featuring Andrew Seward (bass), Warren Oakes (drums) and James Bowman (guitar), still doing business under the Against Me! moniker. Churning out a distinctive blend of punk, rock, and even folk that is impossible to label, they have toured all 50 states and foreign lands from Iceland to Australia, forging an intense connection with their growing legions of fans.


Now, after three successful full-length records on indie labels-- Reinventing Axl Rose (No Idea, 2002); As the Eternal Cowboy (Fat Wreck Chords, 2003) and Searching For a Former Clarity (Fat Wreck Chords 2005), which reached #9 on the Billboard Top Independent Albums chart and featured the thumping "Don't Lose Touch"-- this Gainesville, Florida band is making its major-label debut on July 10, 2007 with New Wave (Sire Records). The title is tidal for a powerful reason.


"We felt like that was our mission statement, or our manifesto for the record," Gabel said. "Instead of sitting back and complaining about how there's no good music out there, you should be energized and take things over. Be the bands you want to hear. It meant 'wave' in a literal sense, coming and washing away mediocrity... Why let someone else have the loudest voice?" asks Gabel, and with his band's new record, he most surely has not.

The album opens with a colossal, angst-fueled one-two punch: "New Wave" and "Up the Cuts" are driving, irresistible tracks, seething with energy and alternately pleading and snarling for change. It's a theme that reverberates throughout the record, both on personal and artistic levels, coming up again most pointedly in "Piss and Vinegar," with Gabel caterwauling "Just say what you're thinking!" to the faceless pap-pushers of the mainstream.


For a D.I.Y. outfit like Against Me!, signing to a major label meant some changes in approach-- namely, that the band was going to enlist a full-time producer for the first time. They didn't mess around, teaming up with alt-rock heavyweight Butch Vig (Nirvana, Smashing Pumpkins, Sonic Youth, Garbage).


When the label was prepping a list of potential producers, Gabel and his mates were afraid the candidates would be hot-shots who "didn't even give a f*ck about our band," the singer says with a laugh. He confirms that a few mega-producers were indeed on the document, "but Butch was there, and I've been a fan of tons of his records, all across the board. I like the fact that the majority of his records are great-sounding sonically, but still sound like real bands. They don't sound like all the life has been drained out of them.


"For his part, Vig was instantly drawn to the relative unknowns the first time he saw the band play live. "I was blown away by the way they played the intensity and the reaction from the crowd," Vig said. "The way the audience sings all the songs, I could see this passionate connection with their fans and the way the band communicates with them.


"The veteran producer was excited to work with a band that's not shy about sharing their feeling on any subject. "One of things I found refreshing in their music, in Tom's lyrics, is that they give a shit, but they're never preachy or anything," Vig shares. "He's saying something that makes you think about what's going on. The songs lyrically are complicated and dense. They're not simple pop songs, but they rock.


"The first single, "Thrash Unreal (Bah Bah)," is a perfect example. In the manner of early Tom Waits and Bruce Springsteen songs, it empathetically chronicles the damaged life of a typical college-town burnout-- a 40-something female junkie who says she has no regrets-- to a defiantly upbeat chorus.


Bass player Seward, who joined Against Me! in 2002, says the new step forward for the band is "not a new adventure-- it's an extension of the adventure. It's something we wanted to do-- we own this move [to a major label]. But I'm not going to lie to you," Seward added. "I was scared shitless, like 'Oh shit we're going to make a complete rookie mistake, we're going to go to Hollywood to some big-time studio and record something that sounds like…" he trails off with a laugh. Instead, Seward is proud of their latest work, saying "Tom has written by far the best batch of songs he's ever crafted… Everything is necessary in these songs, everything is there for the greater good. There's no bullshit or filler in there.


"To make sure he had absolute focus on writing the record, Gabel holed up in a Gainesville motel whenever the band wasn't touring. As with previous Against Me! records, the subject matter on New Wave is freewheeling, as befits the mind of a 27-year old American male at a crossroads in his life. Conceived by Gabel as "in many ways, a reaction" to the "self-centered, dark and moody" terrain of Searching For a Former Clarity, the new 10-track, 34-minute CD covers the topics of love, lust, war, personal integrity and substance abuse, with a unique blend of attitude that Vig describes as "intense, but with a positive undercurrent." New fans drawn by the incendiary 2006 "Jimmy Kimmel Live" performance of Former Clarity's sizzling screed "From Her Lips To God's Ears (The Energizer)," with its plaintive chorus of "Condoleeza! What are we gonna do now?" will find more in store. The former "Army brat" (until his parents divorced when he was 12) has stepped up to the plate and cranked out two more raucous fist-pumpers about war and national identity.


"White People for Peace" celebrates the nobility/futility of protesting war, while "Americans Abroad" rails against corporate greed with the aid of Oakes' road-rage drums and Bowman's ominous guitar tremolos, before boomeranging with a cautionary that maybe we're all part of the problem—even the band. "I don't feel like I'm a person who has any answers," says Gabel, who self-published a ‘zine called Misanthrope while in his teens. "But I often feel like I'm searching for identity in the world and trying to figure out where I fit in.


"Wide-eyed and world-weary. Never naïve, but often idealistic, Against Me! is in many ways the punk-rock embodiment of Matthew Modine's character, "Private Joker," in the classic Stanley Kubrick film Full Metal Jacket. They're flashing peace signs in a seething mosh pit, and there's no place else they'd rather be.




reference : http://www.againstme.net/am.php/band/index

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

just a dream








this is linlin who always have a dream to be a doctor.. but now she is ended to be a student nurse...pity her??? then just pity me.



'im jelous with them im also want to be just like them' im said that to my clinical instructor.

'you will rosmazlen. just finish your study first then you will see how bright your future in this field.

take your degree and you also at least can be a lecturer and teach the others student nurses. you just need to work hard and be honest in your action. remember we always will step one more forward and become better everyday.



yeah madam! thanks for always give me a free advices and make me to never give up in life.

from this moment i will always perform my besh in order to be a great nurse.



and for sure i will never and never end up my life just to be a staff nurse(means after me graduated and pass from nursing board exam).







ok doctor is one of my dream. but here is my hobby..









possing and possing and possing.

pls give me back my tummy before!!! i really need to lose weight now. i will!!!




4 sure you guys kno who is him. rite4??? kenapa gmb ini tetiba melekat di sini??? bkn aku mahu bergosip tentang ini orang akan tetapi ternyata ada tetapi nya lagi. setiba sahaja aku di ward

(firstly before i enter da ward i will check 1st there is no sister in charge. why??? why?? bkn apa kalau da sister, ward will be like : suma staff nurse menunduk-nunduk kan muka apatah lagi si jm(jururawat masyarakat). liar liar mata kami mencari si baju biru tp ternyata sister tak sampai lagi. di hati " fuhh baju biru tiada ". melangkah la kami beramai ramai enter da ward to be specific it is a male ward. 'male ward'??? adeh agak jauh jugak ak menyimpang empat dari gambar yang melekat di atas itu.) bersambung.....


terpijak sahaja kaki aku di ward, my sight was caught up by 'this person'. nah inilah cerita saya hari ini. lelaki yang macam kura kura tiga serupa di atas la yang telah membuat kan 'hari hari mau datang ward'. siapa 'this person'??
his name is mohd syahmi! yey i did it!! i can remebe his name! actually he really look likes him(picture in above. im sorry i never know his name. yang aku tahu tajol jah. sebab aku tak penah ada masa nak menonton that drama series. why? why? sebab my beautiful matriculation never had a tv in their hostel room.. =.=' macam matrik matrik yang lain ada menyediakan alat penyalur media sebegitu di setiap bilik. mungkin kah? ok the answer for this fucking question : of course la nope!!! orang akan macam berkata ' do you lost your mind?' the government never be too rich to supply you with any kind of facilities that can entertain you. for example: for sure la tv kan. ok enough we forget about matriculation and continue with our story.

wow aku tertarik dengan his curly lurly hair.
but im really pity with you..
his admission into the ward because his having a viral fever.
we had done a vital signs on him and we found out that his pulse is too slow and its already below the normal range. pity you. after the doctor finish around the ward the public health inspection came to do an interview to him. we worried if he maybe having a dengue fever. lately, this case rapidly increase and many of admission is because they already infected with dengue.

dear fellows,
you may see this case is simple and you will not take it serious when you heard about this fever. actually this fever is really dangerous and can cause you die.
patient's temperature may flactuated high and low and they will experience low systolic and high diastolic of blood pressure. what the things that cause this to patient? their blood capillaries already burst and their plateletes falls. we can see the patient's skin turned red and we can found the white spots on the skin. white spots is our normal skin while the red one means theres bleeding inside your body. pls immediately get your treatments if you have a fever.
'prevent is better than cure', try to keep your house clean and make no place to aedes to breeding.

ok...suddenly raining here, make me more sleepy...
i will fall asleep. truz me.
sasan already back and she is sleeping right now!!!

dalam hati macam: tak adil. jelous ni aku.

dengan itu aku nak pergi memanjakan diri aku.
make the waterfall n paint the map!!
diri macam oh bahagia nya aku! oh dan mungkin juga dengan pencemaran bunyi yang berpanjangan tanpa merbahaya kan kesihatan orang lain!

oh yeah babi lets go!!!

Monday, April 26, 2010

4/26

26th april 1990, it was the day when i came out to dis world. so dat means today is my bufday!!!! omg i turn 20 dis year! do i already be a adolescene??!! gezzz... do i???!!
LUCKY me i was in tampin today so i cant celebrate it wif others! fux u..... why i was in tampin??? my hometown in taiping and my college in nilai but why suddenly i got throw here??
why?? why u send me to dis BIG BIG town until i can EASILY find something to my dear tummy?? nvm cont. da story. 'WE' was sent here by our college for practical. no nid to kno where my clinical area u also will get kno soon bcause they no place here dat we can go for posting. yeah! of course it was hospital tampin! dis was the 2nd weeks i was here wif my collegues n for sure i was "HAPPY" staying here until i can screamed and shout loudly 'tampin is the besh'!! im sory for those who r staying here. ok im lied. thnx for my fwens who wish me n also god will bless you guys too.. sasan was not here wif me on my bufday sumore! sasan!!! i mish u!! hehe.. act she already bought me a nice mocha cake on 24th april. thnx my laling! but im still confused whether she was tot my bufday on 24th o she bought it earlier bcoz she kno she will not around on dis day. my dear cassandra pls answr me. =.=".. earlier in da morning, i got da news dat our patient before pass away in hospital seremban. i still remebe dat day, i pumped him some oxygen although i have no idea wif dat kind of oxygen. im juz a 1st sem student wif lack of knowledge n i juz hv some knowledge dat i learnt oni for 3 months! can u imagine how im goin to save a life wif dat little little knowledge in my head?! and the worst thing is dat uncle +ve h1n1....zzzzzzzzzz i wif him! by rite now me juz pasrah n hope dat me dont get the infection!!! dis fuckin news reli make me down!! n make me not in da mood to work today. nvm.. i forgot bout him already but i cant stop thinking bout da infection! pls stay me healthy....



thanx ma dear cassandra!

freshie

my dear blog,

today is the 1st day im starting to write a blog
wut gets me to have a blog too?
me also fuckin dont know why im reli wan to have dis kind of site maybe
because i can spend my free time wif writting in dis fuckin blog or else i can put my heart into it
and in case if i has so many story dat i can tell u i can proudly tell you in here.
maybe me also wan to seek some glamaouros juz like wut my other fwens had done.
its feel great when u have one ,truz me. oppss wut da fuckin shit im talkin bout wif da fuckin many grammar errors. dis is wut we call a freshie rite? yeah pls welcome me. ok enuf. stop talkin shit here.